You Are Breathtakingly Beautiful

You are breathtakingly beautiful.

Years ago I was in a crisis that was consuming my life.  I had exhausted all the coping mechanisms I knew and none of them were working.  In an attempt to escape my emotions, I went for a very long run, but as quick as I stopped all the emotional and mental pain returned.  I didn’t know what to do so I went inside and sat down on the floor next to my bed.  After a few minutes I remembered that a therapist had suggested that I journal about my feelings so I pulled out some paper and a pen.  But my mind was a complete blank – it was like I was too close to what was happening to me to even write about it.

I sat there for several more minutes fighting back the tears.  I didn’t want to start crying again because it felt like that was all I was doing and it didn’t seem to be helping.  Then something strange happened.  I felt a calmness come over me.  Everything in the room became very still and quiet.  I began to feel a deep sense of peace.  Then I heard something inside my head as clear as a bell.  Although I was stunned, I wrote it down:

You are breathtakingly beautiful.
Yes, you. YOU.

Take a deep breath and know that everything is okay. Everything.
There’s nothing to worry about. Nothing.
It will all work out.
It always does.

It doesn’t matter what you do,
how much you achieve,
who you impress, what you own.
It simply doesn’t matter.

What does matter is that you are loved more than you can possibly begin to imagine.
And that love is real.
Without change.
You can depend on it.

Let some of that love in by simply breathing.
With every breath you are experiencing what you are so desperately looking for out there.
That’s not where it exists.

It’s here.
Right now.
Right here.
In you.

So stop looking.  🙂

That was the moment my crisis began to shift.  I’d always believed that I could get through anything as long as I knew that I wasn’t alone, but I had no idea that in truth, I was never alone.